Caption contest

Written By: notices and features - Date published: - 35 comments
Categories: caption contest, humour, uncategorized

Keep it seemly.

35 comments on “Caption contest”

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  8. 8

    With apologies to the lyricist and in best Clitheroe Kid voice;

    Everybody stops and stares at me
    These curly little locks are gone as you can see
    I don't know just who to blame for this catastrophe
    But my one wish on Christmas Eve is as plain as can be

    All I want for Christmas is my curly little locks
    My curly little locks
    See my curly little locks
    Gee, if I could only have my curly little locks
    Then I could wish you, "Merry Christmas"

  20. 20

    Hey Santa, if I controlled the Bottom Feeders in the North Pole I'd decimate their pay and conditions like I did at the Airline I ran for a short time.

  21. 21

    (Luxon) : Santa, you don't have any political promises, but people believe in you. What's your secret!?

    2 minutes later…

    (Santa) : Thank goodness he's gone. Hmmm. Wonder what time it is? Damn, where's my watch? I'm sure I put it on my wrist this morning…

  24. 24

    "What do you mean I can't sit on your knee? Just because shit flows from my mouth, it doesn't mean I'm a bottom feeder!"

  27. 27

    Chris "I used to run an airline!"

    Kris " Well I have my own air transport service which is not only carbon neutral but has the capability of visiting every country in the world in less than 24 hours – so beat that sucker."

  28. 28

    “Yes of course it's very nice to meet you again young Christopher, but now that you're grown up I have to tell you I won't be bringing you any more presents, least of all tax cuts. It's your job to spread that goodwill to all men now, mine is more about personifying the idea.”

  29. 29

    Balding man (who owns seven properties) and who shaves his scalp wants to be given a gift from a man with a fake beard and with delusions of ownership of a home where it is more affordable.

    Tis the season to prepare for an election year.

  30. 30

    Hello Santa, did you manage to get that book i wanted for Christmas. What was the name of the book again Mr Luxon.

    Chris, it was called, Charisma lessons for ageing Men.

  32. 32

    (Smiling Assassin #2 – Aka Luxon) :

    "As soon as I'm elected, I'm passing urgent legislation. You won't be allowed to visit kids in the bottom 80% and all the money you save will pay for bigger presents for the kids who already have more than they need. Oh, and the elf Union will be scrapped. "

  33. 33

    Hey there Santa…….can you please visit all seven of my houses……..i'll share the extra pressies among my mates instead of the promised tax cut……

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