Newspapers had their uses

11 comments on “Newspapers had their uses”

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1. 1

   W T F !! The Standard is now stopping to “advertorial” !! Shame on youse !! ; )
   1. 1.1

      It is a good ad though……. I liked the bit where the glass shattered. Personally I think that was unlikely. They use some pretty tough glass on the front of these beasts.
2. 2

   Can’t wipe your bum with an ipad !
   1. 2.1

      It wouldn’t be that different from the bog paper in my old (old) high school.
   2. 2.2

      Personally I prefer my arse-wiping to clean the area without leaving the words of ‘wisdom’ imprinted on my posterior.
      1. 2.2.1

         Could you wrap your fission chips in an an I-pad?
         1. 2.2.1.1

            Probably not wrapping in in an iPad… BUT….

            1. I can’t actually recall the last time I got fission chips in newsprint. As I recall it has all in white paper for quite a few years.
            2. I’ve been on a low carb diet for the past 8 months where both potatoes and batter are on the don’t eat list. So it could be that point is a bit moot for me anyway.
         2. 2.2.1.2

            you might be able to use it as a plate – just don’t stick it in the dishwasher
3. 3

   Indeed, a reputable agency recently administered a thorough battery of tests and found that the best e-reader on the market was, indeed the newspaper. This was among the reasons. Also, you can’t make a hat with an iPad.

   L
   1. 3.1

      That is fuckn hilarious Lew. Particularly like this bit.

      :”What concerned us most about The Newspaper was its lack of Wi-Fi.

      Information on the system was locked, while on other e-readers it was open, ubiquitous and current. Eventually, however, we found this advantage to be overstated, even misleading. Engineers using The Newspaper typically did so 30 to 60 minutes a day. Afterward, they went outside, formed relationships, and took in what life had to offer.

      Those using Wi-Fi-enabled e-readers tended to stay on the couch, scanning video sites for cats; eventually, downloading recipes for artichoke cheese dip they’ll never use. “
   2. 3.2

      Also, you can’t make a hat with an iPad.
      That’s so totally untrue, Lew. Anything can be made into a hat, just ask a toddler.

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