New Zealand’s latest tourism promo just dropped
“The Government of New Zild has made a new tourism ad and it’s surprisingly honest and informative!”
humour
Satire
The Three Wakas of the Coalition of Coxes
Once viewed through the right lens, the politics of the Coalition makes a lot more sense.
Keep on Digging
The latest outbursts and brain farts from the great Kumara of the North…
Open to all today in Nick’s Kōrero – Shane Jones calls climate change ‘woke’ and says, ‘Send the Mexicans home’.
On the tenth day of Christmas Chris Luxon took from me …
A lot actually.
Luxon is deconstructing the plane while flying it
What I’m saying to you is that Chris Luxon has never crashed a country before.
The Civilian is back.
Unemployment is definitely up.
The Civilian, a site that publishes the satire news is back. Hopefully for readers this will last. It only appears to have been running for a few days. Clearly the governments ongoing unemployment program is working well for the art of satire.
National’s eternal road obsession
The year is 2035 and after the McAnaulty-Sepuloni Government is removed from power new National Prime Minister Simeon Brown makes his first new announcement. Guess what it is?
Being a political satirist is difficult these days
One has to really feel for those trying to write political satire these days. How can a satirist be more ridiculous than many of our political leaders they wish to lampoon? Case in point, yesterday’s “resignation letter” from sacked former UK Home Secretary Suella Braverman.
Rules-based cricket disorder
“It isn’t cricket” supposedly set the ethical standard around the British Empire for over a century. Last week saw Lords, the ‘home of cricket,’ validate a damning report about racism, elitism, classism and sexism in British cricket just days after it was issued.
Some People Say Silly Stuff
To err is human and human error is triggerroring, so let’s err on the side of caution and stop erring altogether.
Pale Stale Ale and Other Forbidden Fluids
Little Adolf was relentlessly bullied during his ECE through no fault of his own. Later in life, he became a heavy drinker of pale stale ale.
The weather sucks
I’m back at work at my home office desk today and the weather sucked in Auckland and the north of the North Island over my break. Waiting for Luxon and minons blaming the government for not controlling La Niña – now in the third year of her current reign.It seems like all that National can do these days – blame the government for external events.
Surviving the apocalypse of the Great Twit
The Great Twit at Twitter has been cauterising off staff in excess. I suspect that the platform is going to go down the toilet for that (amongst other reasons). My concern here has been to preserve the embedded tweets in posts and comments on this site if the idiot engineer manages to destroy the platform through simple stupidity.
Bruce’s Reckons: The increased speculation about Chris Luxon quitting
Leader of the Opposition Christopher Luxon turned up to Parliament today and his media spin doctors will be hoping for some good photo opportunities to lift his popularity. But they will be asking a lot.
Australien Government Ad: Election 2020
JuiceMedia have done their high quality opinionated but fact based satire Honest Government Ad describing the lowlights of the current Aussie shitshow. If you haven’t seen it yet, then be my guest.
Just how gross can a anti-vaccine enema be?
Everything has been too serious recently and kind of gross.
Lets keep the gross and but go for the satirical.
Enemas! Pimples!
Will John Key stand for National in Tauranga
The Standard has learned from a normally reliable source that John Key is considering seeking the National Party nomination for the Tauranga seat.
Who will be National’s Tauranga candidate
National is opening up nominations for the Tauranga by election today. The Standard reviews some potential candidates for the seat.
Wanted: a new Leader of the Opposition
National needs a new leader of the opposition. The Standard has been leaked a list of the necessary qualifications …
Advice from Oz for the anti-China media
There’s so many of them here – Guyon Espiner, Anna Fifield, Lucy Craymer, Sam Sachdeva, Laura Walters, John Daniell, Emile Donovan, Paula Penfold, reef fish with the same few sources. Australian Paul Strutynski provides the textbook in his “Guide for budding foreign policy journalists wanting to work for the Nine Network or Newscorp.”
Taxpayer’s Union comrades celebrate glorious Socialist revolution
It is good to see our comrades in the Taxpayers Union celebrate the glorious Socialist revolution that is currently engulfing Aotearoa.
Donald Trump’s letter to Joe Biden
It is customary for outgoing Presidents to leave for the incoming President a short letter of introduction. The Standard has managed to obtain a early draft copy of Donald Trump’s letter to Joe Biden drafted while he was playing golf.
The Trump Covid game
Let’s imagine a scenario where you are the President of the United States and it is in the middle of a pandemic. You then contract the virus yourself. How would you rate compared to Donald Trump?
Taxpayers’ Union promoting Green Party policy
Learning to love the tax.
Tick Tock Tik-Tok
Trump has announced he will ban Tik-Tok from the United States. It’s Chinese-owned so there. Or maybe he will force it to be sold to Americans.Don’t think security is the issue; kids used it to stuff up his Tulsa rally. And it is good for mockery, as clips about Trump and Pompeo show. Don’t think that will stop if Americans own it.
National’s next Auckland Central candidate?
With Nikki Kaye’s shock retirement announcement National urgently needs a new candidate. One name springs to mind.
Sacha Baron Cohen Trolls Neo-Nazis
Nazis Punked; Fucked Off!
Protesters Say Statue Tripped, Fell Into Water
The toppling of a statute of former slave trader Edward Coulson has led to conjecture that the statute may have tripped and fallen rather than forcibly removed and deposited in Bristol Harbour.
National Has Found a Moral Compass
National has embarked on a moral crusade to not lose the Election.
Mark Richardson for National leader!
Michelle Boag thinks that Mark Richardson should be the next National leader after Simon Bridges. Here at the Standard we wish to endorse this proposal.
Covid-19: Important… satire
The latest status
Discuss…
It is a bit of a problem when this was often more accurate than the statements from many governments.
BREAKING NEWS: Simon Bridges Calls on Simon Bridges to Stand Down
BREAKING NEWS: Simon Bridges calls on the leader of the opposition to stand down while the SFO case is before the courts.
The demise of single use plastic bags and the limp vege problem
The rapid demise of the single use plastic bag has just left one hole in my life. I haven’t (so far) been able to replace the one and only second life use that I ever found for them. They were great at keeping the broccoli and carrots from going limp in the fridge.
RIP Terry Jones
Sad overnight news with the death of Terry Jones being announced.
Still not sure what anything National says means?
Gerry Brownlee clarifies.
Civilian offers a bleak look at our future.
The Civilian ‘reports’ in “Trump repeatedly asked Ardern if New Zealand gives asylum very often”. Oh shit! We need to reverse National’s large donation policy and proactively and preemptively pass a law against bolthole refugees.