Caption Contest

Written By: the sprout - Date published: - 42 comments
Categories: campaigning, caption contest, election 2011, john key, leadership, national

42 comments on “Caption Contest”

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  3. 3

    “…. I can show you exactly how we’ll benefit. I’m holding in my hands, now, what NZ stands to gain from asset sales.”

  5. 5

    Everybody applauded as the emperor inflated his invisible balloon – none of the minimum wage actors in the room told him it was bullshit.

  6. 6

    You should have seen the fuss over what colour tie I was to wear… I put on my aqua one – ya know, the one I wore for my TV thing on Friday – but they said it was too bright so I put on my blue one but they said it clashed with the blue background so I put on my other blue one and they said that one will have to do. Then they wouldn’t let me wear my greenstone suit cause they thought the green shiny bits might clash with my blue tie so I had to change into another one. Do ya like my hair cut? I had it done specially for today. Anyways I…

  7. 7

    Key: As you can see, the brighter future is in my hands!
    Audience: There’s nothing there!
    Key: Sorry, that should have been ‘that’s the substance of my current party policies’…

  12. 12

    As Pinnochio said to me, Don, sorry, John, “When I was a Donkey it was this big… but now I’m a marionette again it’s my nose I’m talking about.”

  13. 13

    Brain is engaged in bullshit.
    Mouth is engaged in dribble.
    Hands are engaged in compacting the size of the deficit.

  19. 19

    and then brash and slater and hooton and farrar all deserted so they could spend time filling in their job applications for the business round table.

  21. 21

    “Help! These are somebody else’s hands. There is somebody standing behind me! I am not responsible for what these hands have done.”

  28. 28

    These are my hands. I use them to make throat slitting gestures, to make offensive limp-wrist gestures when I walk the runway and to shuffle papers during leader debates.

  32. 32

    All those Mums-and-Dads investors. This is about how much in total you can expect. It will be the big boys who will get the lion’s share.

  33. 33

    We used to say that government has no role in running a business. Thatsh not too popoolar. So firsh of all we are going to redush their holding to thish much. We will dress the sale up as funding for the fools’ hospitals and schools and things. But that is jush to get ush over the line… you remember what Bill said about shelling KiwiBank – “Not in the first term … well this is the same deceit.

  34. 34

    Oops, I think may I have just upset my navy mates. Fellas, when I said, “Like a drunken sailor” I wasn’t referring to yous.

  35. 35

    National team knocked out in first round of TVNZ “Give us a Clue?” when incapable of communicating how many times he’s broken his promise

  37. 37

    Keys comment after investigation corners him at the TAB: “I’m sorry NZ but I’ve got a gambling addiction and the 300 million a week has been lost, but don’t worry I’ll sell some assets and we’ll go back down the track”

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