Key’s office yesterday released another of their Dear-Leader graphics, this one featuring an “inspirational” quote on education. Here’s a blank version for you to add your own.
It will be hard to beat this contribution (via Twitter) from Mike Kilpatrick:
To borrow from Marty McFly:
Or to go the other way:
Welcome to your worst nightmare
Three more Year of Me
“No thanks!….You are too old and ugly!”
“Vote for me, we’re always looking for people in uniform who can hold a gate open.”
+1
A politician that actually relates to people of all ages, a rare thing indeed
FTFY.
+1
“Why are you smiling, there’s no bright future for you”
Bye dad, don’t forget to take your meds.
Remember for when you grow up – always lock the gate behind you.
Keep him talking, Kylie, security’s on the way.
key:..
‘are you with me..?..or agin me..?’..
phillip ure..
key:..
..’have you seen blips’ list of my mincie-pies..?
..i’m so naughty..!..
..eh..?’
phillip ure..
hahahahahahahaahahhahaha
key:
..’i never got to be a teenager..
..’cos i was raised in a state house..
..didn’tyaknow..?’
phillip ure..
key:
“and then i said..then i said..to obama..’oh yeah..!..hahaha..!..
..we txt each other..!..
..didn’tyaknow..?..”
phillip ure..
key:..
“..can you smell the oil and coal on my breath..?
..gotta mint..?..”
phillip ure..
key:..
‘no..!..it’s not true i’m a shape-shifting lizard..
..that’s just a green party rumour..!’
..phillip ure..
key:..
“..that way lies communism..!..”
phillip ure..
phillip ure ….you should be a comedian
…..btw….hows your horse loving , powerful p…. Vegan Sauasge?
it’s fine thank you..
..seeing as you are asking..
..how’s yours’..?
..phillip ure..
lol….i dont have a Vegan sausage yet….but i am thinking about it
Our Glorious Leader maintains blokesy demeanour while escorting school fundraisers off his property – his entourage were responding to a “credible” security threat in the swimming pool of his Hawaiian residence.
Male student: Hey Mr Key we are studying economics, the MSM are calling our economy a Rock Star economy.
Key: Actually it’s true, you’ll do well at Crosby/Textor talking like that son.
Female student: But Mr Key Standard & Poors have just down graded our rating… Ha ha that must make it a ‘Pop’ Star economy?
Key: Young lady I better introduce you to Paula Bennett she will tell you of her early life..you sound like your heading that way.
“OK kids, we’ve finished the photo shoot. Make sure you return those uniforms to the Costume Hire shop” (THINKS ). Let’s all hope no one twigs that we had to do this photo using my gate as a school entrance during the school holidays.”
Would you like a lolly
How did you get to be PM?
Well I made the poor know they were poorer, the rich think they were richer and the middle look the other way.
Oh I’m just eyeing up the property, can’t help but think it’s a waste of land use and could be better utilised by a mansion or two.
I will give you a lolly if you don’t vote for Dotcom
Who knows what kind of world your children will inherit, long as we are right eh?
“Don’t you kids know who I am?”
key:..
‘are you on facebook..?
..i’m on facebook..’..
phillip ure
key:..
“..what’s instagram..?..’
phillip ure..
“You know kids ….Dotcom hasn’t been on the front page of Women’s Weekly yet in his swimming togs….I have…”
Hey, you kids ever done that ‘planking’ thing? My son Max Key is.
Unknown guest seen hanging round at school gates.
Police would like to talk to anyone who can identify him
Now pish off! You’re too young to vote.
Just put your little finger through the bars so I can see if you’re ready for eating, said the Wicked Old Wizard.
Hi I’m John Key.
You’re Primo Minister.
Always evolving, protean and plastic.
A fun guy.
A funguy
A fungi
key:..
..”..i never got to be a teenager..
..’cos..ackshully…i was studying ayn rand..
..have you read ‘atlas shrugged’..?..”
phillip ure..
key:..
“..do you think poor people are yucky..?
..i think poor people are yucky..”
..phillip ure..
girl:..
..”..who are you..?..”
phillip ure..
key:..
“..what do you mean you don’t know who david letterman is..?..”
phillip ure..
boy to girl:
“..quick..!..run..!..”
phillip ure..
key to girl:..
“..no i’m not wearing a wig..?..”
.phillip ure..
EEEeeewwwww Who was that old perv ? tried to give me a Business card, he called it a selfie.
“You’re leaving, so soon. Oh, for a brighter future, me too.”
Welcome to planet Key, there’s room for just a couple more…
“So when are you two off on your OE? – mine starts in November”.
“Please don’t hurt me Mr.”
Finally, a job I can do.
You two are my idea of an egalitarian society. All the rich are equal and all the rest…. weeelll…..who cares.
JK: “Sorry kids, there are no toilets on Planet Key”
Students: “That’s OK Sir, we just crapped in your BMW”
JK: “Oh yeah? Well I have already crapped on your future, now f*ck off”
Students: “No worries, we are f*cking off to Australia pretty soon”
“You make us laugh, is it true you’re Winston’s puppet?”
Several minutes after the photo shoot…
Student A: About that bloke’s toupee…whaddya reckon?
Student B: OMG it’s, like, sooooooo I dunno…erm…different…ha ha ha.
Student A: ” I dont care if this is a photo Op, take your left hand off my arse”
Student B: ” You heared her You Perv or I head Butt You!”
Keys: “This never happens in photo Ops with My Mate Barack”
Key: Ah, fine upstanding industrious young people! So, tell me, you’ve just turned eighteen, who are you going to vote for this year?
Female student: Not sociopathic right-wingers, thank you. And please tell Colin Craig that his tinfoil hat isn’t at all fashionable.
Male student: Please, Prime Minister, don’t privatise my grandmother!
It will cost you five bucks each to come thru this gate plus gst- John
Kids awe shit u mate
Ok Which of you sods super glued my hand to this gate?
Awww Dad do we have to go see Auntie Paula again?
Dad I have heard she drinks her own urine ..she’s not human!
Now Now children she’s not that bad
The Tree: ” Oh Children I am here……It’s Your Auntie Paula, don’t you recognize me?”
Girls welcome to the brighter future of gated communities!
Girls welcome to the brighter future of gated communities!